Archive for the 'Things that don’t end well' Category

Dec 02

The Art of Acquiring Intangibles

01. Players, Andrew Friedman, Cheap is as cheap does, Jordi Scrubbings, Jose Molina, Josh Lueke, Lifestyles of the rich famous and good looking, Things that don't end well Jordi Scrubbings No Comments »

Our correspondent Jordi Scrubbing is back with his latest take on all things Rays…

With the annual baseball winter meetings almost upon us (and no, I am not going this year as I did in 2006 and 2010), the Rays are looking to tweak, twist, and trade their way into a better roster than they had last year. Anyone who watched them last year knows they had problems. Even though they won 91 games, they were far from a perfect team.

But before talking about future acquisitions or who the Rays might part ways with, I want to talked about who the Rays have already added to the team this offseason. It is usually rare for the Rays for pick up players in the early days of the offseason. And the two players the Rays have added to the roster so far couldn’t be more diametrically opposite. One is a pitcher who hopes his personal past doesn’t affect his potential, and the other is a catcher who hopes his on-the-field contributions can merit keeping his knowledge.

The last time I wrote here I wrote a letter to Rays owner Stu Sternberg. I wrote about the need to market the team better. I mentioned how the organization could better use social media, how they could better push their personalities, and a few ideas for theme nights and other brainstorms that I thought may increase ticket sales.

One of the ideas I didn’t mention because I thought it was common sense was to stay away from problem children – those players who have somewhat nefarious backgrounds. I get that some problem children have very good stats or very good potential and they usually come cheap. But one slip up could mar public perception of the team and give the organization a deeper black eye than the same action would for the Yankees or the Cubs or any almost any other team.

So far the Rays have had success with players who might be considered “behaviorally risky”. And they’ve shimmied off players such as Elijah Dukes and Al Reyes after their misdeeds. For example, they took a risk on Matt Bush, he of the infamous drunk police dispute and so far Bush has been a success.

Although each player brings his own set of conditions and drama, I think the organization is playing with fire by taking chances with players with nefarious backgrounds. The Rays have to fight against a very difficult environment. For whatever reason the Tampa area is a hotbed for athlete misbehavior and unfortunately I think it’s just a matter of time before the Rays get burnt.

I’m not saying some players can turn over a Read the rest of this entry »

Jul 04

Sold By The Story: The Lesson Of Toe Nash

Casey Kotchman, Fans do silly things, Sam Fuld, The temptation of not being tempted, Things that don't end well, Things that shine a little less, Toe Nash Jordi Scrubbings 5 Comments »

Our correspondent Jordi Scrubbings is back with another take on the Rays…

As fans, we love stories. We love extolling the virtues of our favorite athletes.  We love cheering for heroes as they wage battle against their hated rivals. We love creating stories around players as they become more engrained in our collective consciousness.

With the emergence of twitter, these playful narratives have grown from the tables of our local sports bar to entire fan communities and even to the players themselves. They are no longer inside jokes of a select few, but ideas and identities embraced by everyone. They transcend cyberspace and are seen on signs, t-shirts, in mainstream media, and even accepted by front offices for ballpark promotions.

However playful, innocent, and creative narratives are, we should be careful. Sometimes they cause strife, struggle, and confusion at every level, from the fans, to the media, to the players themselves. Sometimes if we are not careful, we get entwined with a good baseball story as we would with any good book, and fail to see the world crumbling around us.

This year, Rays fans have created amazing narratives around two players who have outperformed expectations. Seemingly heaven sent, these two players saved our team when they were down and kept the Rays from falling in the standings and out of relevance. Early in the season, it was Sam Fuld with his exceptional defense and blazing speed and timely slap hitting. While a good real-life tale, Fuld’s performance on the field made him cyber-legendary.

Did you know Sam Fuld can leap small buildings with a single bound? He’s Super Sam.

Did you know Sam Fuld once scored on a bunt … off his own bat? Tis written in The Legend of Sam Fuld.

As the season has progressed, it has been journeyman first baseman Casey Kotchman who has captured the hearts, imaginations, and Twitter attention of the Rays community.

Did you know Casey Kotchman’s bat is made of the same wood as the wands in Harry Potter? It’s the Magic of Kotch.

Did you know pitching awards are now determined by who can get Casey Kotchman out the most? It’s the Magic of Kotch.

Where the narratives fail us, however, is when we mistake our own impressions of a player with his real life ability. We trick ourselves or trick others into believing Sam Fuld is not the second Joe Orsulak but the second coming of Carl Crawford or that Casey Kotchman is really Hal Morris and not another Pat Putnam, his number one comparison on Baseball-Reference.com and possibly the only baseball player known for eating dog biscuits.

Narratives also cause problems when they cause Read the rest of this entry »

Oct 17

The Cold Dome of the Soul

Baltimore Orioles, Boston Red Sox, Spring Training, Tampa Bay Rays, The Trop, Things that don't end well, Things that should have never happened Jordi Scrubbings 7 Comments »

Ever since B.J. Upton meekly popped up for the final out of the final game of the Rays’ 2010 season, nearly every scribe, blogger, writer, and analyst following the team has penned his or her ode to the past seven months of Bay Area baseball. Some have written of disappointment, some of joy, and others of promise. Yet they all convey the overall emotion of a fan’s love of both their team and the game of baseball.

After every baseball season, whether good or bad, whether I rooted for a winner or team that lost hope after the second week of April, I am reminded of “Green Fields of the Mind”, a brilliant essay written by former Major League Commissioner A. Bartlett Giamatti. Although it is over 1,300 words, the first 91 are among the most poignant ever written about baseball.

“It breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring, when everything else begins again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings, and then as soon as the chill rains come, it stops and leaves you to face the fall alone. You count on it, rely on it to buffer the passage of time, to keep the memory of sunshine and high skies alive, and then just when the days are all twilight, when you need it most, it stops.”

Giamatti’s essay discusses his passion for following the 1977 Boston Red Sox, a team that won 97 games yet finished 2.5 games behind the eventual World Series Champion New York Yankees. Giamatti goes into depth discussing their eventual elimination and how a simple fly ball to center drained the life and feeling from all of the New England faithful.

(Note: if baseball had the wildcard in 1977, Giamatti would have never written his piece. Boston would have made the playoffs thanks to winning the season series over a Baltimore Orioles team that also finished with 97 wins and 64 losses. In a 2010 world, the Sox would have clinched the wild card on the day prior to the one Giamatti wrote about and played the Kansas City Royals as the Yankees would have coincidentally played the Texas Rangers.)

Of course, it is not only those in New England whose passion comes to an abrupt halt. In every region of America, wherever fans follow their favorite team, wherever fathers and sons play catch, or wherever people pack stadiums or bars or living rooms, there is a feeling of emptiness every October.

Even in Pittsburgh and Kansas City.

For us here in the Tampa Bay area, it begins at FanFest, when we re-awaken to baseball and explore the new facets of the upcoming season – whether it be a new player, new member of the announce team, or a new feature of the ballpark. There is a joy not unlike a family reunion, when you greet the friends and “family” you parted ways with the October before. You are together again for another season.

(From 1999 to 2007 that exchange was not unlike the reunion of Han Solo and Luke Skywalker in Return of the Jedi.

Fan 1: Together again, huh?
Fan 2: Wouldn’t miss it.
Fan 1: How we doin’?
Fan 2: Same as always.
Fan 1: That bad, huh?

Then of course came the “new hope” of 2008.)

Following Fan Fest, we have the added advantage of seeing our team up close and personal during Spring Training. We are not as beholden as the rest of the baseball nation in relying on beat writers and bloggers to tell us who is winning a positional battle or who is going to make the team. We can make the short jaunt to Port Charlotte and see it with our own eyes.

Then comes the magical moment of Opening Day – a day that should be a national holiday – where every fan has hope and everyone is in first place, if even for 24 hours.

The real thrill, and one we are barely getting used to, is when our team remains in first, or at least in a battle for first from April to October. It is a fun ride. One of scoreboard watching and magic numbers*, wild cards and aces. One I will miss. One I shared with friends, family, and the entire Rays community, both online and at the ballpark. Sure we’ve fought, we’ve argued, and we’ve blown a few gaskets, but that’s what a family does. And now that our summertime reunion is over, as Giamatti said, we are left to face the fall alone.

(Isn’t it fitting that for most teams, “magic” numbers make hope disappear? Almost as if David Copperfield or David Blaine waves a wand and makes teams vanish from relevance.)

As for me, I’d like to thank Cork for my midseason call-up and now that the season is over I hope we can talk about extending my contract. Keeping it team friendly, of course.

Jul 24

[THE HANGOVER] The One Where We Discuss Just One Perfect Game

Things that don't end well Cork Gaines 59 Comments »

Rays White Sox Baseball

The GBT – The Good, The Bad and The Telling sandwich, where The Bad is nice and lean and the The Telling is ripe.

click above image for boxscore

THE GOOD: Apparently it was “just one game.”

THE BAD: Mark Buehrle threw Major League Baseball’s 18th perfect game, against the Tampa Bay Rays.

THE TELLING: So that happened. 27 batters went to the plate against Mark Buehrle and 27 were retired. It may have been the most efficient performance in the history of baseball as Buehrle was only on the mound for a grand total of 32 minutes in order to execute perfection.

So what did we learn? This incarnation of the Tampa Bay Rays just isn’t very good. They are not going to the playoffs unless something drastic changes and it needs to change now.

It was just one game.

No. It is more than one game. Good teams don’t lose 3 of 4 to mediocre teams. I can’t find a single power ranking that has the White Sox in the top 10. And it is not just the White Sox. This was the fourth time this season the Rays have lost 3 games in a series. In fact, the Rays have only won 15 of 30 series this season. They are mediocre. End of story.

It was just one game.

Good teams don’t get no-hit. Good teams don’t let another pitcher throw a perfect game. Are we supposed to be comforted by the ’88 Dodgers and ’04 Braves? Those are the only two teams to be the victim of a perfect game and still make the playoffs. Those two teams also played in crap divisions and did not have to worry about chasing down the two best teams in baseball.

It was just one game.

How many times this season do we have to hear “it was just one game.” Yeah, it was one game. Sometimes teams miss the playoffs by “just one game.” What are we supposed to say in October when the Red Sox and Yankees are in the playoffs and the Rays finish 4 back. Can we cash in those “one games”? ENOUGH! I am sick of it! Play like you are capable of playing or move aside for somebody that will. STOP THE DAMN POOZLE-FOOTING!

It was just one game.

That might work in the NL East if the Rays are chasing the Mets. But the Rays are not chasing a team that is destined to choke. They are chasing THE NEW YORK YANKEES and THE BOSTON RED SOX. Those teams are not going to roll over and die.

And what makes this worse is that the Yankees and the Red Sox have been SERVING UP THE AL EAST ON A SILVER FRIGGIN’ PLATTER. AND ALL THE RAYS CAN DO IS CONTINUE TO PLAY LIKE THEY HAVE BEEN WEARING THROWBACKS ALL YEAR! Mark Buehrle has had five votes for the Cy Young IN HIS ENTIRE 10 YEAR CAREER!

And now I have to walk up and down the streets of New york and Boston with those smug fans thinking that everything is back to normal in the world. Their precious playoff birthright is about to be handed back to them. AGAIN! When was the last time the Yankees lost a damn game? June? I’ve had it!

It was just one game.

Yes. I keep hearing it. All these Rays fans “tipping” their damn caps to Buehrle. I DON’T GIVE A RAT’S YOU KNOW WHAT ABOUT MARK BUEHRLE! I care about the TAMPA BAY RAYS. Oooh. We got to witness history! You know who else witnessed history? EVERY OTHER TEAM THAT LOST A HISTORIC GAME. The Rays weren’t a part of history. They were the punchline of a joke.

You think fans of other teams are surprised a pitcher threw a perfect game against the Rays? Hell no. To them they are still the Devil Rays and this game was just proof that the Rays are the next Colorado Rockies. Proof that 2008 was a fluke. Proof that the Rays were one hit wonders. Proof that the AL East really is just a two-team division.

And when this team falls 10 back in a couple of weeks, do you think fans are going to the Trop to watch the Rays play the Orioles? They’ll be lucky if there is 12,000 at that Wednesday game. And then the laughing and pointing will start. “Rays only have bandwagon fans…Tampa Bay cannot support a baseball team…Nice stadium.” I’m tired of hearing it. NO MORE!

I’m mad as hell. I’m mad at the rotation which has consistently underperformed all year. I’m mad at an offense that has needed to be carried by Ben Zobrist for over a month. BEN ZOBRIST! He started the year on the bench! THIRTY-TWO DAMN MINUTES!?!? Way to make him work guys.

It was just one game.

I have heard it all. “It was just one game…Calm down…Have a beer…Relax…What’s the big deal…Get some sleep…It was just one game.” SCREW THAT. Why should I calm down after my baseball team just sh!t themselves in front of the entire world? And this is not the first time the Rays played like a little league team this year. This just happens to be the bottom of the proverbial barrel.

It was just one game.

Yep. It was just one game. Just one of 18 perfect games. Maybe 12 or 13 have video footage. So now, every time they talk about the great moments in baseball history and every time they show Buehrle’s gem, I have to watch Jason Bartlett hitting a ground ball to end it. I have to watch the White Sox dancing on the field with the Rays in their dugout. Yep, it was just one game. Just one symbolic game that will always remind us how the 2009 Tampa Bay Rays underachieved all year. Great. Awesome. Fan-friggin-tabulous.

It was just one game.

Yeah. It was just one game. One game that proved this team is going nowhere. One game that proved this team is done. One game that proved this team is roadkill.

Oct 10

[ALCS] Reminding Red Sox Nation Where They Came From

Things that don't end well Cork Gaines 6 Comments »


Does it make us mean people if we bought a few of these for the Red Sox fans in our lives? We love reminding them that the Rays have as many AL East titles in the last 11 years as the Red Sox and the Rays only sucked for 10 years, not 86.

Oct 10

[RAYS INDEX PANTS PARTY] Come Join Us At The First Ever Rays Index Pants Party

Pants Party, RAYSHEADS, The RAYSHEAD Army, Things that don't end well Cork Gaines 5 Comments »

Sometimes the stars align in such a manner, that we all have to just sit back in awe and admire the power. The Rays are in the ALCS against the hated Red Sox. This was the perfect time to conduct a Hajj and journey to our Mecca.

The good news is we will be in attendance for both games 1 and 2. The bad news is that there will not be any Live Blog-A-Baloos unless Marc Topkin let’s us borrow his laptop.

ROADTRIP TO THE TROP! And all RAYSHEADS are welcome to join us.

WHEN: Saturday October 10. ALCS Game 2 versus the Boston Red Sux

WHERE: Pre-gaming at Ferg’s Sports Bar (4 pm).

Check the Twitter updates in the sidebar for updates and more specifics.

Sep 15

[RAYS INDEX POLICY SHIFT] In The End, We All Lose

DRaysBay, Things that don't end well Cork Gaines 26 Comments »

The following post is not baseball related. If this bothers you, please do not read. “The Hangover” will be up shortly, and we can all get back to more important matters…kicking the Sox asses.

I would much prefer to discuss this in the comments section at DRays Bay, but I cannot. I have been banned from commenting at DRays Bay. Seriously. Why? Apparently because I disagreed with the author and tried to have a discussion on the matter within the comments section of their site.

For the few of you that actually give a crap, you can see the entire thread HERE.

The worst thing I said was to point out that 29 general managers disagreed with the author. In return I was falsely accused of plagiarism by Editor-In-Chief RJ Anderson.

Also nice touch on the GM line. Completely original, did you see that one on Deadspin too?–R.J. Anderson implying that everything on Rays Index is stolen/copied from Deadspin.com. This is not the first time I have been accused of this by R.J. Anderson.

Later I was referred to as “numbnuts” by the same guy (“Vin“) who is apparently worthy of being a comment moderator.

You have your own blog for that, numbnuts–Vin’s response to my assertion that “I was just trying to talk baseball”

The “D” must stand for “Irony”.

Over the years I have been openly critical of DRays Bay on about 4 or 5 occasions. Most of the times that we disagreed with assertions that they made about baseball-related matters, our policy has been to limit our disagreements to the comments section on DRays Bay. Even the times when they stated something that was blatantly wrong, I chose to comment on their site, rather than nitpick their posts on this site.

Only a handful of times in three years have I felt that they wrote something that required me to step away from that policy. Those were usually for the times when they stepped away from talking about baseball. Like the time one writer called Rays fans “dumb” or another time when a writer called Rays fans “morons”. And one time we poked a little fun at them for their dramatic decision to commit themselves to the Rays new color scheme.

That is three posts out of several thousand posts on DRays Bay in the past three years.

On the other hand we have posted positive or neutral reactions to their site hundreds of times. One time we even dedicated an entire post to defending RJ Anderson against some belittling comments made by a member of the mainstream media.

I expressed my concerns about the above comments on DRays Bay to RJ Anderson in an email. His response was to ban me from the site. So now if there is a post on DRays Bay that I feel needs a comment, correction or clarification, I will have to find a new venue to make my point. I will have to post any future comments in a more public forum. Here.

As they say…The gloves have come off.

Jun 10

[RAYS INDEX PANTS PARTY] Come Join Us At The First Ever Rays Pants Party

Pants Party, Things that don't end well Cork Gaines 11 Comments »

Due to a number of unfortunate factors, we have yet to attend a Tampa Bay Rays game this season at The Trop. This bothers us to no-end, especially everytime somebody bashes recent attendance figures. It has been difficult for us to remain quiet for the fear of sounding like a hypocrite since we are such big fans and yet we haven’t found our way back to St. Pete yet this season to support the boys.

Well, it is time to rectify this clusterf***. Sometimes the stars align in such a manner, that we all have to just sit back in awe and admire the power…In less than a month “Mrs. Professor” will officially become Mrs. Professor. A few of my close friends and I have been discussing how best to celebrate the end of my long and storied bachelorhood.

Vegas was the consensus…”CLICHE!” I yelled.

No. This was the perfect time to conduct a Hajj and journey to our Mecca…Mind you, I am the only Rays fan in the group, and I had to suffer through much whining, but the asses were kissed and back-alley favors were conducted and the trip is now official. ROADTRIP TO THE TROP! And all RAYSHEADS are welcome to join us.

WHEN: Saturday June 21. Rays v Houston Astros

WHERE: Pre-gaming at Ferg’s Sports Bar (4 pm). Party Deck in left field during the game.